Early on in 2011, I signed up for a mission that I was quickly to regret. I had three months , to pray and hear God’s direction on a hefty decision. The fact that the opportunity had arisen was enough for me, so I launched headfirs.
What followed were months of self-doubt, constant pressure and which evolved into angst. Seeing no other alternative I pressed on and the stress continued to mount. My health declined and I was sleepless on many nights.
After one of Pastor Doug’s sermons on hearing God;s voice, becoming and maintaining one’s spiritual awareness, the pattern of my prayers began to change. At the start of each day, I enquired as to where God was going and what He was doing. Then I asked if I could tag along! To my surprise and delight, God took me with Him daily; that is unless I was unwilling or inattentive – something that happened often. I pushed forward, taking no heed to the voice in my head urging me to my own forays… I had been there and done that! No more!
Little by little, the tide and barrage of life abated. There were increased moments of blissful solitude when I heard from God and felt so relaxed. Those were of course, fleeting moment because I was still hell-bent on my project. The interest was alive and well but I am glad to report that God’s hand kept a firm hold, as I continued to pray and ask His heart’s desire.
The battle for the control of my soul and spirit was raging, more fiercely tha n I had ever known. Now I understand why ignorance is termed as bliss! Oh! the irony. But the intensity of meeting Christ in prayer grew. His Holy Spirit presence developed a longing for His constant companionship. He remained faithful and in response, my yearning to commune with Him evolved.
Within days and for the following weeks, God’s answers started pouring in, thick and fast! I was so relieved. Then surprise was followed by a deep irrational fear about the next step. The chance to openly declare a change of direction has brought intense healing for this now-delivered back-seat driver!
I pressed in, with the support of Margo, Anne-Marie, Julissa, Bindi. These dear friends chose to keep me accountable with love. I was able to relax, clear my head and respond with clarity. I asked them to pray with me and they did so frequently, without delay, doubt or complaint. The real meaning of pride comes from proactive hunting of prey by the lionesses. These ladies form a formidable pride!
It has been a long and bumpy ride but I am so glad to be getting off. Thank you dear lionesses (my dear, dear friends) and special thanks as always, to The Lion of Judah! May His name be glorified for transforming us all!
Penning off for now,